What Help Is Acceptable After Childhood Sexual Abuse
I have seen responses on forums to childhood sexual abuse victims. There are times when it is completely disturbing. Not only the victims post, but the advice, "sympathy and compassion" from the well meaning posters.
Wanting sympathy is what every human desires, however the feelings and emotions you are going through can be detrimental if they are not addressed.
There are times when a sexually abused person needs help. Forum users are generally not in a position to help. To try to get advice from them is far from healthy or helpful to your mental state or well being.
Should a Victim of Childhood sex abuse Use Psychotherapy or Psychiatry?
Some psychotherapists or psychiatrists, can cause more harm than good. However there are times when they are necessary. There are some Psychiatrists who will generally just listen and join in only when they feel it necessary or feel what they say can be helpful. For some victims of child abuse this is all that is needed, a listening ear.
If you are a victim and feeling despondent then you should visit one now, just find one.
Later on there will be time for you to find one that will listen and work with you through the effects of sexual abuse. One that will not tell you what ever you want to hear. A good therapist, will not do this. A Therapist that has your best interests in mind. If they agree with every thing you say, start questioning their integrity.
There are those who want your frequent returns, which means money in their pocket. They don't want to risk upsetting you, as you may never return, hence tell you what you want to hear. However, your judgement is needed here. It may be that as you are in a sensitive frame of mind, they don't want to tip you over the edge. You don't need any more stress added.
One who has suffered childhood sex abuse has deep seated problems. To not address them in a proper manner can be detrimental, especially down the track.
Leading Questions Are Detrimental To You
The mind is a scary and tricky place. Look out for anyone who questions your abuse with leading or direct questions before you give them the full facts, eg:
- Did your father sexually abuse you
- Was "this" done to you, or "that" done to you.
If you can't remember certain details and they fill in the blanks be extremely wary. This sort of questioning is leading. Being that the mind is able to deceive even yourself, you can end up worse off if you deal with a poor quality therapist. This is one that asks leading questions or makes presumptuous assumptions.
This type of direct questioning was done a couple of decades ago by therapists and police with serious repercussions. Things have changed since then, however there are still therapists who use this type of questioning.
Our minds will make things up for us, if suggestions are planted. False memories are a serious thing and can cause many other problems for you and the person concerned. You have enough problems you need to get through without a psychotherapist or psychiatrist filling in the blanks for you. There are documented cases, where this has caused tremendous pain and heartache to those concerned.
If you have suffered childhood sexual abuse then choose a therapist wisely and be prepared to change to another if they are not fitting the bill. It is much healthier for you to do this than get advice from forums.